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Getting in early only to find the manager who's got all the answers is not in today Being asked to process a whole shed-load of material adjustments 1 hour before the audit is supposed to finish Realising that the 'we-could-finish-a-week-early-and-have-a-jolly' budget has disappeared into thin airBeing shoved into a cold, pokey, little room in the basement with no windows, mobile phone reception, printer or copier, miles away from where all the people you need to speak to work and 12 floors from the nearest decent snacks vending machineFinding out that your favourite prestigious audit client has gone bust and your audit partner has gone missing.
A correspondent wrote to the FT's Dear Lucy's column in July about dress codes referencing a particularly 'tight dress' she had been advised not to wear.
In her reply, columnist Lucy Kellaway included this reference to female tax advisers: "Depending on the country and line of business you are in, the dress may be OK – or not. It’s all pretty arbitrary. We tolerate less flesh from the person who is doing our tax returns than from the person who is cutting our hair. Stupid, really; but that’s the way it goes." The picture I've attached to this piece is of Britt Savage from the Nashville band Twang Deluxe who shredded a pile of tax forms to make the dress you see her wearing!
A man was driving away from the tax office when all of a sudden he has to swerve to avoid a box falling off the lorry in front. Seconds later a policeman pulled him over for reckless driving. As the policeman starting writing the ticket he noticed the box was full of nails and tacks.
"I had to swerve or I'd have run over those and blown my tyres!" protested the driver.
"Ok", replied the officer, ripping up the ticket, "but I'm still bringing you in."
That was the headline for a small piece at the back of the Business section of yesterday's Sunday Times. Apparently 18 "of PwC's finest" are competing in 'Don't stop believing' on 15 August 2010. "For the uninitiated, this is a TV show on Channel Five where contestants sing. I hear the staffers wanted to incorporate PwC into their act's name but management weren't keen so they've gone for 'Elements'.
The group, formed of 14 women and 4 men wearing pinstripes and shirts with velcro fastenings, will perform a mix of 'Walk this way' and 'Nine to five'. I'm not supoosed to tell you what they'll do with the shirts but there may be a partial revelation of assets."The piece is accompanied by a clever cartoon (by Pilbrow) showing a balding man watching the tv show. His angry wife is complaining: "You usually hate looking at accountants' figures."