Tuesday, March 05, 2013

When the 'Just a Minute' subject was 'Tax'

This is an extract from the transcript of the radio programme broadcast on 9 May 1989.


Nicholas Parsons: Wendy Richard to begin, the subject Wendy, tax. 

WR: There are various forms of tax, carpet, thumb, income and road. The latter I feel is a downright liberty to motorists. Have you seen the state of the highways and byways in London at this time? It's full of pitholes and potholes. It's an absolute disgrace! As for the first one... I've forgotten what I said the first time... 

BUZZ 

NP: Lance Percival challenged. 

LP: Well she forgot what she said, so she paused. 

NP: She did indeed yes Lance. You have 40 seconds to tell us something about tax starting now. 

LP: The other tax not mentioned so far is VAT. And come 1992 I think you will find this will change quite a considerable amount. For instance we are all set at 15 percent in this country at the moment. But in that year I mentioned earlier you will find that things like food are taxed quite... 

BUZZ 

NP: Wendy Richard challenged. 

WR: This is supposed to be an entertaining programme! I mean it's depressing enough that we know about VAT and that. But I mean you know you er... Well can you get challenged for boring? I mean I'm not, I'm not being rude Lance but it was going on a bit! 

NP: Well I think you were being rude but it was still being very entertaining. So we'll give her an extra point because we enjoyed it didn't we. And er we, take it to heart Lance because as she says it is supposed to be an entertainment show, you don't want to put us all in the doldrums. Um, 24 seconds though for you to continue on tax starting now. 

LP: This is actually a very entertaining idea, the idea of VAT on clothes... 

BUZZ 

NP: Richard Murdoch got in there. 

RM: Well he had two ideas. 

NP: Yes and he had two VATs as well. 

WR: A rarity! 

NP: You can't have VAT too often. Right so Richard Murdoch you got in with 21 seconds to tell us something about tax starting now. 

RM: Well up in the north country there was a man who bought a wig. And he was, asked how much it was. And they said "that's 15 pounds with tax". And he said "I don't need tacks, I'm just going to clang it on!" Um, of course that being a north country word... 

WHISTLE 

NP: So Richard Murdoch with his wig kept going until the whistle went in spite of the audience laughing so loudly. 
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