12 ways to have fun completing your tax return

1. Do it while wearing your favourite fancy dress.
2. Every time you claim a deduction, do a victory dance. 
3. Add happy or sad emojis wherever you can on the tax returns 
4. Invent a new tax category for "unavoidable chocolate expenses." 
5. Write a tax-themed haiku for each page you fill out. 
6. Do it naked
7. In "For Office Use Only" area write "Approved. Send refund immediately."
8. Design a tax-themed tattoo for each deduction you claim. 
9. Translate all financial jargon into Shakespearean language. 
10. Attach a ransom note demanding a tax refund for the safe return of your financial sanity. 
11. Insist on using interpretive dance to explain any discrepancies in your return. 
12. Write a heartfelt letter to HMRC, explaining why you believe you should be taxed in chocolate coins instead.

Accountants who play 'chicken' in January

I first came across this concept many years ago:

An accountant told me that they play a version of Chicken each year as an incentive to get all of their clients' tax returns in on time. 

They said they always leaves their own tax return to be the last one filed by their practice each January.  And that, on one occasion they did this at 23:59!

Does anyone else play daft games like this at year end?

Acronyms for different client types

• DINKYs - Dual Income, No Kids Yet
• DONKEYs - Dual Overdraft, No Kids Yet
• MINKs - Multiple Income, No Kids
• OPALs - Older People, Active Lifestyle
• SWELL - Single Woman Earning Lots in London
• SEMI - Suburban Executive MIddle manager
• MACs - Married And Comfortable
• SITCOM - Single Income, Two Children, Outrageous Mortgage
• LOMBARD - Lots Of Money But A Right Dope
• SMARTIEs - Smart, Middle Aged, Risk Taking Individuals
• PIPPies - People who Inherited Parents' Properties
• WOOPies - Well Off Older People
• FIZZ - Financially Independent, Zero Zeal, 
• CHEERS - Couples Having Excessive Expenses, Really Splurging 
• WITTY - Well-Invested, Thrifty, and Totally Young-at-heart 
• CHARMs - Couples Happily Avoiding Real Money 
• PAMPERs - Professionals Accumulating Money, Planning Exotic Retreats

Punny accountant and their clients

A punny accountant was describing some of his clients:

I assisted a bakery recently; they needed help with their financial dough-cuments. Ensured their profits were well-kneaded, proving accountancy isn't just a piece of cake. 

Dealing with a fitness centre was taxing, but I managed to balance their accounts without breaking a sweat. It seems crunches aren't the only thing that requires precision! 

Handled the finances for a music store, making sure their financial harmony was pitch-perfect. Balancing the books was a real score! 

Collaborated with a coffee shop on their accounts. It seems financial balance is a bit like the perfect blend – it requires the right mix. 

Partnered with a fashion boutique to tailor their financial strategy. It turns out balancing the books is just as important as finding the right fit.