Friday, July 26, 2019

Simplistic approach to clearing debts. Does the accounting stack up?

It is the month of August, on the shores of the Mediterranean Sea it is raining, and the little town looks totally deserted. It is tough times, everybody is in debt, and everybody lives on credit.

Suddenly, a rich tourist comes to town.

He enters the only hotel, lays a 100 Euro note on the reception counter as a deposit, and goes to inspect the rooms upstairs in order to choose one.

The hotel proprietor takes the 100 Euro note and runs to pay his debt to the butcher.

The butcher takes the 100 Euro note, and runs to pay his debt to the pig grower.

The pig grower takes the 100 Euro note, and runs to pay his debt to the supplier of his feed and fuel.

The supplier of feed and fuel takes the 100 Euro note and runs to pay his debt to the town's prostitute who in these hard times, gave her "services" on credit.

The hooker runs to the hotel, and pays off her debt with the 100 Euro note to the hotel proprietor to pay for the rooms that she rented when she brought her clients there.

The hotel proprietor then lays the 100 Euro note back on the counter so that the rich tourist will not suspect anything.

At that moment, the tourist comes down after inspecting the rooms, and takes his 100 Euro note, after saying that he did not like any of the rooms, and leaves town.

No one earned anything. No one produced anything. However, the whole town is now without debt, and looks to the future with a lot of optimism.....

First seen in HM Williams newsletter 'Account' in 2009

Friday, July 12, 2019

The journalist, the engineer, the lawyer and the accountant

A businessman was interviewing applicants for the position of Divisional Manager. He devised a simple test to select the most suitable person for the job.

He asked each applicant the question, "What is two and two"?

The first interviewee was a journalist. His answer was "twenty-two."

 The second applicant was an engineer. He pulled out a calculator and showed the answer to be between 3.999999 and 4.000001.

The next person was a lawyer. He stated that in the case of Bodmin vs. HMIT in 1854, two and two was proven to be four.

The last applicant was an accountant. The business man asked him, "How much is two and two?"

The accountant got up from his chair, went over to the door, closed it then came back and sat down.

He leaned across the desk and said in a low voice, "How much do you want it to be?"

The accountant got the job.

10 pop bands featuring accountants - or do they?

Ledger Zeppelin  The Rolling Balances  Fleetwood Macroeconomics  The Balance Sheetles  The Fiscal Fighters  The Profit Margin Boys The Doubl...