- a Twitter tax, levied at .001p per tweet
- an iPhone tax, levied only for boasting about what it can do
- a tax on the downloading of tracks simply as part of a campaign to get a Christmas number one
- a Wii tax levied on the breaking of household objects
- a tax on irritating ringtones, doubled for Christmas ones
- a tax on plastic packaging for toys that needs an entrenching tool and a pneumatic drill to open
- a tax on muzak and double for Christmas muzak, treble for Christmas muzak before December
Hundreds of stories, jokes, videos, anecdotes, links and quotes relating to accountants, accountancy and tax related topics. If you've got something that makes you laugh - do send it in to mark@bookmarklee.co.uk
Thursday, December 31, 2009
7 new taxes for 2010
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Ron Howard plans a tv comedy set in a local IRS office
It will be written by Brent Forrester, writer-director on another workplace comedy, NBC's "The Office." Forrester and Howard are executive producing with Howard's partners at Imagine TV, Brian Grazer and David Nevins.
"It's an idea Ron had toyed with for many years as a feature," Nevins said. "Eventually, Brian and I convinced him it would be better as a TV show."
The three met with several writers until hitting it off with Forrester.
"The one thing that unites all Americans is their suspicion and hatred for the IRS," Forrester said. "That makes the characters on the show underdogs, because outside the office everyone is suspicious of them."
The IRS agent at the center "is trying hard to believe that his job is good and noble and provides a very important, vital service," Forrester said. "It's a classic workplace show; the model for it is 'Taxi,'" Forrester said."In essence, it's a group of eclectic characters who have come to the job from different paths and who represent different points of view and different voices."
There will be procedural elements to the show, too.
"'L.A. Law' had lawsuits, and 'CSI' has murders; this show has audits, tax collection and special ops, with the FBI against organized crime and drug dealers," Forrester said.
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Beware your comments on taxman's youtube videos
Mark Krowly didn't take kindly to IRS agent Gerald Fitts making a YouTube video warning potential tax dodgers to look out this season; he told the IRS to "f--k off" during a 197 character rant that may have led to his audit.Please note that this comes from www.thespoof.com (which means it's not a true story)!
Krowly says he was angry the IRS would invade a "peaceful hamlet like YouTube with fussy, veiled threats," and was investigated by the IRS shortly after leaving his comment, a comment he admits crossed the line.
"I basically challenged the legitimacy of the tax, as well as the legitimacy of Mr. Fitts' birth," he said.
Before being audited he received dozens of emails from concerned YouTube citizens who warned him he might need to get his financial affairs in order. Krowly realized at that point he was "pretty much toast."
When he tried to erase his comment, a cryptic message on the webpage said "Comments Disabled." Krowly's comment had gone into the void, as well as hundreds of others. The IRS would not comment on these comments, or if it is procedure to collect them.
A woman in Utah wishing to stay anonymous says she is particularly worried about Krowly's fate, because she "commented" directly underneath his comments in support of his opinion.
She has hired an attorney.
Monday, December 21, 2009
Take more care when charging for 'time spent' on clients' affairs
We took over a client a few years ago. The reason he had decided to move was that on Christmas eve he had telephoned his accountant and said to him that he and a few colleagues were in the pub next to the accountant's offices and would the accountant like to join them. The accountant said "no".
Next time the client received a bill from the accountant he noticed that he had been charged for the accountant taking that 'phone call.
That single entry cost the accountant a client - and no, it wasn't the well known firm of Scrooge & Marley.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
An Accountant dies and goes to heaven
An Accountant dies and goes to heaven. Saint Peter starts asking him all the usual questions required to get into heaven.
The accountant, it seems, has repeatedly helped people cheat on their taxes and embezzle funds. Finally, in exasperation, St Peter asks, “Well, have you ever done anything good, anything totally unselfish and altruistic in your entire life?”
“Well,” says the accountant, “Once I saw this pretty lady being beaten up by a bunch of hoodies. So I yelled “Hey jerks, why don’t you pick on somebody your own size” and then I reached for my mobile phone to call the police, and took off running. They forgot about her for a second and she managed to run also.
Saint Peter asks, “I’m looking through the book of your life, and I don’t see this incident recorded. When did it occur?”
The accountant replies, “About five minutes ago.”
Monday, December 07, 2009
2049 - A vision of the tax side of the accountancy profession
Imagine my surprise to note that the only other tax vision they published was that of Dave Hartnett who took the invitation a little more seriously than did I. Here's what I have forecast.
There will be only two remaining professional bodies for tax agents. Businesses
will tend to seek tax advice from registered accountants but private clients
will prefer registered tax advisers as tax is more important to them than
accountancy. Registered tax advisers will typically work alone or be employed by registered accountants, by lawyers or by big brands such as RAAC, Tescobury, InsurancesDirect, The National Bank or The European Public Library and Computer Service. All registered tax advisers will have a revenue officer liaison opposite (ROLO) as their direct contact point in His Majesty’s Revenue Collection Service.
What do you think?
Thursday, December 03, 2009
Unleash your inner accountant
Tuesday, December 01, 2009
The wages of sin...
"The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling"
- Paula Poundstone (American Stand up Comedienne) - as reported on twitter by @DianeKennedyCPA
True story about an ex-chartered accountant
True story - An accountant in his sixties sells part of his practice. He keeps a few favoured clients and stops paying his Institute subs. ...
-
How many accountants does it take to change a light bulb? How many would you like it to be? How many accountants does it take to change a li...
-
1. You work very odd hours. 2. You are paid a lot of money to keep your client happy. 3. You are paid well but your pimp gets most of the mo...
-
The most obvious answer as to why accountants are sometimes referenced, disparagingly, as 'beancounters' might involve counting the ...