Is Dr Who liable to pay UK income tax?

 The Editor in Chief of Taxation magazine speculates on this question in the 14 Jan issue.

He wonders how she would fare under the statutory residence test as she seems to have spent a lot of her time in the UK.

Perhaps in the next series her deadliest enemy could turn out not to be a dalek but someone from HMRC's anti-avoidance unit. 'Dr Who and the follower notice'. You heard it here first.

The answer to the question though is clearly: No, Dr Who is not liable to pay UK income tax.

The character has no permanent home here, was not born here and earns no money here. Plus, and we should keep this in mind, she's a fictional character allegedly from another planet. HMRC have no taxing powers over such people, real or not ;-)

Tax advice for fisherman in 2021

Following Brexit an accountant approached one his clients who was a fisherman.

I can see you floundering as things are being scaled back. I've been herring rumours you may be taking advice from salmon else. What's the reel fishue? 

I know a fintastic plaice to start. Let's close your company down and set you up as a sole trader. I could shoal you why this could be cod for you. It sardinely an op-perch-tuna-ty worth considering.

Notfishstanding the net benefits we don't want HMRC to sea you doing anything fishy. 

Why don't you mullet over. 

I'm here all week....

Dodgy excuses for late filings in 2021

With the tax return filing deadline looming clients should be discouraged from trying any of these excuses for late filings:

1. My tax return is shielding
2. I had to travel to Barnard Castle to check my eye sight before I could read and complete the forms
3. I voted 'Leave' , which includes leaving having to pay taxes
4. I don't believe taxes exist they are a hoax
5. Under the latest regulations travelling to my computer isn't allowed

A dodgy client reacts.....

Last year I saw an anonymous report from an accountant whose client was being interviewed under caution by HMRC. The conversation warrants recording on this blog

HMRC were alleging that the client had been buying ‘childrens’ clothes from a wholesaler who was zero-rating them. But upon inspection, these were quite clearly adult clothes. 

In the first interview, when the client was asked if his business had ever acquired clothing from said wholesaler, he answered "No. Never heard of them".

When presented with photographic evidence of his van entering and leaving the wholesaler’s premises, the client suddenly remembered that he had collected a few samples of clothing from them, but had decided against entering any supply agreement. 

HMRC then presented a further set of photographs that showed the same van in the same warehouse again, seven days later. 

“It was probably to return the faulty clothes!” claimed the client, panicking under the pressure. 

After another two sets of photographs were proffered onto the table, showing a further two weeks worth of evidence, the HMRC officer asked the client for a final time: 

“Has your company ever bought 'childrens’ clothes from the said wholesaler?” 

To which the client replied: “How many more photos have you got?”

Exercising can be taxing

A little known fact about the Queen of England. 

She is a keep fit enthusiast and insists on all of her gym equipment being laid out in exactly the same way ahead of each training session. When she can't make it she pays a small fine. The sign on the palace gym door reads: HM Customs and Exercise.

Why do accountants swear so much?

A recent experiment sought to determine which profession is the sweariest. And the answer, controversially has been reported to be 'accountants'. 

The three-month survey* of 1,400 employees at 100 UK companies across 14 different sectors discovered that workers in accounting, banking and finance used the most profanity during team meetings and video calls. 

The banking press reports this as an achievement for bankers. The accounting press however also wants to claim the crown. 

To conduct the experiment, the researchers asked volunteers from each sector to record the number of times a member of staff swore during meetings over a 12-week period. 

The data was then collated and compared, ultimately identifying the (combined) accounting, banking and finance 'profession' as the the one most likely to swear.  This was apparently because they uttered the highest number of obscenities during the study. And they won by a long shot. 

'Accountants' apparently spoke a total of nearly 1,000 swear words at an average of 80 per week. This was about 17 times the number for the least sweary sector. 

The research suggested that the most common swear word among 'accountants' began with F. I think we can guess which one.

Of course another F word itself has also caused a lot of swearing among accountants this year........ 

Furlough 

*The survey was conducted by commercial property agent Savoy Stewart

If you don't want to be an accountant....

This is taken from a recent piece in the Times Diary: 

Stephen Fry tells a story about the careers master at his school who asked the boys what they wanted to be and then wrote that down as his recommendation for them.

If they didn't know what they wanted to be, apparently the careers master put down 'accountant'.

Back then Fry didn't know what he wanted to be but clearly didn't want to be advised to become an accountant. So, when it was his turn he said his ambition was to be a careers master.

The master instead put him down as 'comedian'.