Funny message on gift card for retiring accountant

Message seen on the front of a greeting card given to a tax partner on his retirement from a sizeable firm of accountants:

All I ever wanted was an honest week's pay for an honest day's work.

The accountant song (Money all day)

This song seems to have been inspired by working for one of the big 4 accountancy firms

New style acronyms for accountants

YAPAs - Young Ambitious Professional Accountants

EWES - Experts With Expensive Style

TAPAS - Top Accountants Planning Awesome Setoffs

MAGIC - Masterful Accountants Generating Instant Credits

TRICKs - Tax Returns that Interest Cute Kittens

CARDS - Clever Accountants Reading Dull Standards

PAULA - People Against the Use of Lousy Acronyms

Could YOU explain a surplus so it makes sense to a child?

Stand Up comedian reveals why he gave up accountancy

Indian comedian Kunal Rao starts his set by explaining why he gave up chartered accountancy.

He moves onto other topics after 2 minutes.

Outrageous late payment excuses

This only has a tangential connection with accountancy but still feels worth sharing here. Drawn from a survey conducted by FreeAgent and summarised on AccountingWeb:

• Can I just buy you a pint and call it quits?
• Our chief executive is still on his sailing holiday
• I have been in hospital for 2 weeks to have my tonsils taken out (they hadn’t)
• My cat is sick
• My dog ate your invoice
• Your invoice was unethical
• I have no money left, but you’ll get what you’re owed if you work on my new project. And move with me to Qatar.
• You didn’t chase me enough for payment
• (to a professional photographer) The photograph you took is of me, so I don’t need to pay you
• I referred you to a friend, so I thought that would mean you wouldn't charge me

Any more?

Does an FD need to keep a close touch on everything?

A UK based Finance Director once reported that he had realised all was not well when he discovered that the company's BMW was actually in Madrid and being used by a prostitute.

Apparently this led to the FD's realisation that the company was not totally committed to traditional corporate governance.