Thursday, December 30, 2010
Friday, December 24, 2010
- ...he would report true and fair (naughty and nice)
- ...he would require that you had 95% utilisation rates all year round
- ...his work shop would be a grotty conference room without windows
- ...you'd only have to be "materially" good to get "substantially all" of your gifts
- ...most of the insignificant things on your wish list would be disregarded and "noted for next year"
- ...he would give you review comments on your christmas list
- ...he wouldn't get paid overtime but his elves would
- ...it wouldn't be called an Xmas list, it would be a request list and listed in order of importance.
- ...he'd have to follow those Hobby Loss Rules. Not much profit in the Santa business :-)
- ...he'd wear a suit and tie instead of a red suit
- ...he'd divide the world's children into assets and liabilities
- ... there would be 4 big santas
Thursday, December 23, 2010
- ...Christmas day would be referred to as "sign-off"
- ...he should worry that Wikileaks would publish his list of presents
- ...all of the kids clothes would be from "Baby GAAP"
- ...his helpers would work in a small room cranking out toys during "present season" which gets longer every year.
- ...letters to Santa would be carried forward from prior year
- ...He'd take advantage of the North Pole's tax haven status
- ...He'd probably moan about all the red tape he has to deal with
- ...his family still wouldn't have a clue what he does at work
- ...he would think about the mileage deduction for his reindeer drawn sleigh!
- ...planning would be done after the gifts were delivered
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Assume you didn't know that an ACA is an Associate of the Institute of Chartered Accountants in England and Wales (ICAEW). What would you find out if you ask Google?
Looking just at the first few results you would have a choice of:
- ACA training - for ICAEW
- ACA is the representative body for UK consulting actuaries
- ACA Sports Limited, a UK based online sports shop stocking Football Boots, Football Shirts, Team Kit, Footballs, Shin Guards, Goalkeeper Gloves and Clothing
- ACA is an acronym that may refer to: A Current Affair, an Australian current affairs based television program [Thanks Wikipedia!]
- Association for Continence Advice (ACA) - organisation for health and social care professionals concerned with the progression of care for continence.
And if you think that's bad, check out this more comprehensive list of ACA acronyms. It includes examples such as:
- Adult Children of Alcoholics
- Australian Cricketers' Association and
- Asynchronous Criticality Avoidance
- Oh, and this one: Association of Chartered Accountants.
Saturday, December 18, 2010
[ur = your; gsoh = good sense of humour]
Ugh...do I have to get up and go to work today? Haven't I already put in enough hrs this week? Sometimes I hate being a tax accountant :(
My accountant uses the words "bangin'" and "smoking" when discussing my tax return. I find this oddly comforting.
Visiting my tax accountant today - the only loud talker I can tolerate. Being friendly and the fact that I only see her 45 mins a yr helps.
I have embarrassingly ardent feelings for our accountant, Mel. He's in his seventies but efficiency and accuracy are SUCH a turn-on.
Really....one day I'll be a really great accountant. But the statistics are starting to get on my nerves today.
Just got a very nice tax rebate from the lovely people at the Inland Revenue. :-)
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Monday, December 13, 2010
Friday, December 10, 2010
1. You shall have no other Gods before me.
2. You shall not make for yourself any graven image of a tax inspector to throw darts at.
3. You shall not take the name of George Osborne in vain.
4. Remember the 5th April to keep it holy. If you have not saved tax by then, you may as well rest on that day.
5. Honour your accountant, who is doing a very good job for you.
6. You shall not murder, unless it is a City banker.
7. You shall not commit adultery – because marriage is tax efficient.
8. You shall not steal, unless you are Robin Hood.
9. You shall not bare false witness against your neighbour, unless your neighbour is a benefit thief.
10. You shall not covet your neighbour’s hammock, unless your neighbour is Gillian McKeith or Lembit Opik.
Thursday, December 09, 2010
In 2010, a terrifying zombie outbreak threatens to consume humanity and you fall victim to the undead curse, doomed to hunger for human flesh. In a startling turn of events, the army actually manages to contain and eliminate the threat. Life quickly returns to normal.
Except you’re still a zombie. And it’s tax season.
Complete tax returns as fast as possible without eating your coworkers! With any luck, you can still make it to zombie partner.
Wednesday, December 08, 2010
"It seemed so harmless. I started making journal entries..then, secretly at home, I would post the entries to T accounts, and then I started recording them in ledgers. It just felt so good, and then I started doing financial statements and I couldn't stop.... "My apologies to anyone attending such a group and for whom this is a real issue.
Tuesday, December 07, 2010
"that nice man on the radio"John of course has long been the BBC's first choice to explain tax issues on radio and TV.
Friday, December 03, 2010
- You can't wait to do your own tax return.
- You think the GAP store sells accounting standards.
- You think the CMA awards on TV relate to accounting (CMA is the Country Music Association).
- You cheer at the Oscars when they announce the accounting firm in charge of the envelopes.
- You read film credits to identify the name of the Production Accountant.
- You double underline your mother's name when preparing her death notice.
- You do an NPV calculation when you receive an indecent proposal (Of course this makes perfect sense if you are married).
- You do an NPV calculation before deciding not to have children.
- You can explain the difference between "downsizing", "right sizing", "re-engineering" and "firing people".
- You use the term "value added" with a straight face.
- Your Valentine's Day cards have bullet points.
- You schedule a meeting with your spouse to discuss the past year's performance.
- You aren't sure, but you think that you can claim depreciation on your human capital as a tax deduction.
- Your idea of "absolute terror" is an unbalanced T account.
- Your idea of "creativity" is a one-sided journal entry.
Thursday, December 02, 2010
Wednesday, December 01, 2010
My first experience of tax policy was, as a schoolboy, listening to Philip Hardman’s analyses of the Budgets of the 1980s.
Now I don’t want to give a false impression that, as a teenager, I had a precocious interest in tax matters, or that I rushed home from school for the sole purpose of watching a discussion about the tax changes contained in a Budget. I like to think I was pretty normal for my age. And that my interests were fairly typical for a teenage boy – cricket, football, girls and, of course, macroeconomics.
Monday, November 29, 2010
10. Do 'em naked.
9. Instead of a restaurant receipt, send them leftovers from the meal in question.
8. Frequent use of the word "eleventeen."
7. Claim a deduction, do a shot!
6. In "For Office Use Only" area write "Approved. Send refund immediately."
5. Apply a long-term capital gain rate of 20% to a mutual fund, do a shot!
4. Sneeze on forms.
3. Instead of using dated definition of income, use the proposed revised definition under section 643(B) in which conforming amendments are made to regulations affecting ordinary trusts, pooled income funds, charitable remainder trusts, trusts that qualify for the gift and estate tax marital deduction, and trusts that are exempt from generation-skipping transfer taxes -- that always puts a smile on my face.
2. Deduct $100 in medical expenses for all the paper cuts you suffered because tax form is 75 damn pages long!
1. Audit yourself, if you know what I mean.
I gave up on number 3!
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
"Who'd have thought there were that many. And now we need to consider whether we need to keep them all."David continued:
"Among those reliefs is Millenium Gift Aid. I'm all for taking a long term view, but do we really need a relief that won't be relevant again for another 990 years?!"
Friday, November 12, 2010
"Just recently the drains were blocked and the bungalow was flooded, We had 6,000 gallons of effluent all over the inside and out.Please consider all the things we've been through."
Thursday, November 11, 2010
It features the ubiquitous Stephen Fry as the voice of the earth and encourages accountants to do more to aid sustainability.
Tuesday, November 09, 2010
Monday, November 08, 2010
One of the advantages of having died is that there is no tax in heaven. It's a beautiful place. When I was alive I paid tax through the PAYE system and had not had any direct dealings with the taxman for many years. I can't say I'm that fussed about the outstanding return as I had no unearned income and left very little in the way of an inheritance for my sole living relative, my sister. Also, such matters seem so mundane since my recent demise. I might add that I have not yet met anyone from HMRC up here!
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
"Nemi?" "I'm busy, what are you doing here?"
I just wanted to say 'Hi'
"And that I've brought my accounts for 2009."
"Here they are. Must dash!"
Nemi by Lise appears in The Metro. This cartoon published 26 October 2010
Friday, October 22, 2010
The VAT office letter said:
"We are sorry to learn of your recent demise. We have processed your request for deregistration but if at any time in the future you become liable to be VAT registered again, you should apply to this office for a new VAT number."A favourite story of Charles Little from Keens Shay Keens Ltd as related by Neil Warren in his recent article in Taxation2 magazine.
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Dear Universe. I would like some kind of super-good-looking young well-hung accountant boyfriend who will do my tax returns and gst for me.Reply from a friend:
Does he have to be a good cook too or is that asking too much?Response:
Well I can cook quite well so I'd be happy to do all the cooking if he did all the paperwork haha ;)Then 30 minutes later:
I can't believe no accountants have asked me out yet! Michelle must have been joking about me being a guy magnet. How cruel! :-Thank you @KristieAddison from the Transit of Venus Project
Monday, October 18, 2010
Sadly 5 of the inspectors said that it did.
The other 95 couldn't answer the question as they didn't know what a rebate was!
Thanks to Neil Warren who related this story in a recent article in Taxation2 magazine.
Friday, October 15, 2010
Thursday, October 14, 2010
By 2001 the Yellow book had expanded to two volumes. In 2007 it was four volumes and now, for the first time it's a five volume colossus.
Couldn't decide whether to post this here or to add some commentary on the TaxBuzz blog. Guess it's only the title that's vaguely amusing really. The ever growing quantity of tax law is no joke! (I commented on this a year ago: Twice as much tax law under Labour as in previous 18 years)
Friday, October 08, 2010
A couple of weeks later, he is sitting up in bed, having made the beginnings of a good recovery. The office’s senior partner goes to visit the patient in hospital. He finds the patient sitting up in bed reading The Bible.
“Good morning. How are you? What are you reading?”
“Hello, I’m reading the Bible.”
“Why? I didn’t know you were religious.”
“I’m not. I’m looking for loopholes.”
With thanks again to Clive Browne of Browne and Green accountants
Monday, October 04, 2010
A man, clearly to be viewed as an accountant, is standing in front of an ATM, withdrawing cash. With him are two boys.
On seeing the cash being withdrawn from the ATM, one boy turns to the other and says,
"There - I told you money doesn't grow on trees!"With thanks to Clive Browne of Browne And Green accountants
Friday, October 01, 2010
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Steve turned to his friend, Mike, and asked, "What would Economics be without assumptions?"
Mike thought for a moment, then replied, "Accounting."
Monday, September 20, 2010
He is known to introduce himself as a “failed accountant”. That, he explains, is simply to establish a rapport with the audience. “People today are all stressed out about home economics, and accountants are the current bogeymen. [Since when?]
Dodd is the butt of a lot of his material and repeated references are made to his love of money, his dislike of what he insists on calling the Inland Revenue and his past run-in with them. “They sent me a self-assessment form the other day. To me! I invented self-assessment.”
During the trial it was revealed that Dodd had very little money in his bank account. He did however have £336,000 in cash stashed in suitcases in his attic. When asked by the judge, "What does a hundred thousand pounds in a suitcase feel like?", Dodd made his now famous reply, "The notes are very light, M'Lord."
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Wednesday, September 08, 2010
My friend looked confused. She asked:
"Why are you talking at the childrens' soft play area?"Doh!
But I could see why that was her first thought. She's a new mum!
Softworld is the UK's only show dedicated to demonstrating accounting and finance solutions
Softworld Autumn 2010 takes place on 19-20 October at ExCeL London. I'm speaking on "How accountants can use and abuse social media"
Monday, September 06, 2010
Tax dodging: more popular than football, more subtle than chess, and played by millions. Some know the rules of the game, a few have some idea of the tactics, but what do they know of their faceless opponents in the distant computer centres and Special Compliance offices?
In this 'partial, prejudiced and jaundiced overview', a former Senior Inspector of Taxes presents a frank insider's view of a working life in taxes. With humour, relevance and a refreshing minimum of technical jargon, he casts an ironic eye on the professional activities and private passions of Dobson, one of the 'odious agents of the Income Tax'. Dobson's investigations uncover the professional fouls, dirty tricks and shady practices of those for whom tax dodging means anything from modest evasion to criminal fraud: both illegal, of limited effectiveness, and with serious consequences if detected.
Thursday, September 02, 2010
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
- Getting in early only to find the manager who's got all the answers is not in today
- Being asked to process a whole shed-load of material adjustments 1 hour before the audit is supposed to finish
- Realising that the 'we-could-finish-a-week-early-and-have-a-jolly' budget has disappeared into thin air
- Being shoved into a cold, pokey, little room in the basement with no windows, mobile phone reception, printer or copier, miles away from where all the people you need to speak to work and 12 floors from the nearest decent snacks vending machine
- Finding out that your favourite prestigious audit client has gone bust and your audit partner has gone missing.
Monday, August 23, 2010
In her reply, columnist Lucy Kellaway included this reference to female tax advisers:
"Depending on the country and line of business you are in, the dress may be OK – or not. It’s all pretty arbitrary. We tolerate less flesh from the person who is doing our tax returns than from the person who is cutting our hair. Stupid, really; but that’s the way it goes."The picture I've attached to this piece is of Britt Savage from the Nashville band Twang Deluxe who shredded a pile of tax forms to make the dress you see her wearing!
Friday, August 20, 2010
George Bull of Baker Tilly has christened the concept TAXBOs. He notes the irony of this as ASBOs are now on their way out.....
It could catch on - although I note that Barry Hutton in South Africa got their first with his accountancy practice, Taxbo Services which was established in 1988.
"I had to swerve or I'd have run over those and blown my tyres!" protested the driver.
"Ok", replied the officer, ripping up the ticket, "but I'm still bringing you in."
"What for?!" retorted the man.
"Tacks evasion", answered the policeman.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Monday, August 16, 2010
Friday, August 13, 2010
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Monday, August 09, 2010
Apparently 18 "of PwC's finest" are competing in 'Don't stop believing' on 15 August 2010.
"For the uninitiated, this is a TV show on Channel Five where contestants sing. I hear the staffers wanted to incorporate PwC into their act's name but management weren't keen so they've gone for 'Elements'.The piece is accompanied by a clever cartoon (by Pilbrow) showing a balding man watching the tv show. His angry wife is complaining: "You usually hate looking at accountants' figures."
The group, formed of 14 women and 4 men wearing pinstripes and shirts with velcro fastenings, will perform a mix of 'Walk this way' and 'Nine to five'. I'm not supoosed to tell you what they'll do with the shirts but there may be a partial revelation of assets."
Wednesday, August 04, 2010
Monday, August 02, 2010
Friday, July 30, 2010
We've all been imagining what could happen in due course when the Office of Tax Simplification presents its first report.....
Instead of getting into my own Tardis, I will simply report on extracts of the outcome that Taxation have anticiapted
Tax News: 10 October 2010
The Office of Tax Simplification (OTS) today issued its first report, on the simplification of small business taxation.
The OTS tax director John Whiting said that the timetable for producing the report had been tight but he thought they had done a good job.
The reaction from professional bodies was, however, mixed. The Chartered Institute of Taxation had some serious concerns.
‘This report shows a worrying lack of consistency,’ complained CIOT policy director John Whiting.
'I am saddened that the OTS Tax Director did not feel able to resist this pressure from the Treasury side.’
However, for the OTS, Whiting rejected the accusations.
‘Anyone who believes that I have been influenced unduly by Treasury ministers does not know me very well. If the CIOT’s policy director wants to discuss this with me, he knows where to find me.’
Meanwhile, the Low Incomes Tax Reform Group complained that the OTS was concentrating on the wrong problem.
They said that small businesses had advisers to help them find their way through the tax system, whereas many pensioners and other people on low incomes were struggling to understand complex tax calculations on their own.
‘The OTS needs to concentrate on the areas which really affect people,’ said LITRG spokesperson John Whiting. ‘That means simplifying the rules for those on lower incomes, including the rules for tax credits.’
Asked to respond to this attack, the OTS tax director became uncharacteristically irritated.
‘Look, everyone thinks this job is easy. If that LITRG spokesperson or the CIOT policy director think they could do it they’re welcome to try.’
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Monday, July 26, 2010
The 'twitter deduction' starts with a note:
If you do not use twitter you do not qualify as a freelancer and may not use this form.The total deductions box at the foot of the page requires entries for, inter alia:
The Department of Treasury has determined that due to the huge amount of time that the freelance American workforce devote to tweeting, such activity shall be taxed according to the following formula [which I will not attempt to replicate here!]
- ordinary/necessary pyjamas (that satisfy the equivalent of UK's 'wholly and exclusively' rule
- delayed adulthood penalty
- time wasting allowance
- your own personal navel blog
- your food blog
- your other food blog
- tax tip webinars
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Tuesday, July 06, 2010
An auditor is known to have had AUD 1T and a tax specialist had TAX 1NG
But my favourite is the ex-Inspector who had a number plate S99 TMA and who loved parking next to cars at conferences and other events, with VAT or TAX or CA on their plates just to give them an unsubtle reminder.
Any more stories or ideas for personalised number plates for accountants?
Monday, July 05, 2010
"To the British, defrauding the DSS is a crime; defrauding HMRC is more of a sport."To highlight the difference in approach they referenced the two separate online forms at Direct.gov.uk
"When grassing up the suspected villain, the tax fraud form asks you to provide approximate age, national insurance number and brief description of the person. The benefit fraud form asks you for: ethnic group, their build, their eye colour, eye wear, hair colour, hair type. It then gives you a separate menu of hair type options which include: afro, bald, dirty, dreadlocks, greasy, long, mohican, pony tail. All the classic hairstyles of the potentially criminal. And, brilliantly, 'wig'. That's right, if you're living next door to a toupee'd ethnic with glasses, get online now."
Friday, June 18, 2010
This girl says she went to an accounting seminar met interesting people including accountants. Really? How about marine biologists?
Between this weather, crazy clients and outlandish demands I'm ready to pack it in as a photographer and become an accountant like my dad :(
Am now officially a grown up. I have an accountant and have just received tax advice.
Just recommended me a 'goth accountant'. If the tax man doesn't pay up I'll have him hexed.
Found a tiny scrap of paper which proves firstly I'm not going mad, and secondly I don't have to pay £650 to my old accountant!
Ron Artest just thanked his psychiatrist. If it was me I would thank my florist, my proctologist and my tax accountant .. in that order.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
In thi$ life, we all need $ome things mo$t de$perately. I think you $hould be under$tanding of the need$ of u$ $tudent$ who have given $o much $upport including $weat and $ervice to the firm.
I am $ure you will gue$$ what I mean and re$pond $oon.
The next day, the senior partner sent this letter of reply:
I kNOw you have been working very hard. NOwadays, NOthing much has changed. You must have NOticed that the firm is NOt doing NOticeably well at present.
NOw the newspapers are saying the world`s leading ecoNOmists are NOt sure if the United States may go into aNOther recession. After the NOvember presidential elections things may turn bad.
I have NOthing more to add NOw. You kNOw what I mean.
Wednesday, June 09, 2010
A few weeks later the accountant meets his friend again. "I remembered what you said about references so last time I was asked for one I simply put "Ex-Chartered Accountant".
"How did your client respond?" asked the friend.
"Oh - I think he was pleased. He didn't say anything but I heard him later telling someone I was an EXcellent accountant."
Thursday, June 03, 2010
The Telegraph reported that "Blackout curtains beckoned" as both firms realise there will be scope for industrial espionage - at their closest point the two offices are only about 10m apart.
On the FCAblog I noted one insider commenting:
As an occupant of E&Y's premises, I can exclusively reveal that we're going to deploy psychological warfare against the new neighbours - firing lasers into their windows, blasting propaganda speeches and brass band music through loudspeakers 24 hours a day, and hanging a 9-storey high picture of our beneficently smiling global chairman on the side of our office. They won't hold out for long.Nice one!
Tuesday, June 01, 2010
An accountant told me recently that a new client recently sent him a package. On opening it the accountant found a copy of the client's passport. What else? Another one. Same as the first. And another, and another. Indeed the package simply contained almost 3 dozen photocopies of the client's passport. None had been certified by a solicitor - or anyone.
The accountant called the client to acknowledge receipt of the package and to find out why he had sent so many copies - and not had any of them certified.
The client was pleased to hear the package had arrived safely.
"But I still don't know why you asked for 35 copies."
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
- Longest name for a tax team in a large firm
- Most widely dispersed tax 'team' in a large firm
- Highest percentage lock-up in a medium sized firm
- Most imaginative disclosure on a tax return by a medium sized firm
- Longest meeting with HMRC in a medium sized firm
- Most fee notes for tax advice given to one client in one year, in a medium sized firm
- Worst client toilet in a small firm
- Best reasonable excuse for a late filed tax return by a small firm
- Most obscure tax qualifications
- Most pedantic tax author
- Least qualified Treasury minister
- Tax smartarse of the year
Monday, May 24, 2010
Sticking with the company name, LexisNexis, he suggested that perhaps it was "the teletubby that time forgot, or the teletubby who went to Monaco. Lala and Po didn't want to redomicile - they just went into forestry."
Amongst his other tax related one-liners were:
"Until yesterday I thought that IHT was something women used as contraception and that a P11D was a Diesel version of a P11"Ok - perhaps you had to be there.
"The only thing I do know, is that, in my experience, the Married man's allowance is... about once a month"
Thursday, May 20, 2010
His talk was peppered with references to what Rip Van Winkle might think about key aspects of tax policy, after being absent from the UK tax policy environment for 30 years. He concluded that many of the key issues are much the same today as they were 30 years ago.
At the end of his talk however he generated much laughter from the sizeable audience by observing that:
"The final thing that Rip Van Winkle would do is to pick up the tax code to see if it were any shorter..."
Monday, May 17, 2010
Steve Punt has suggested this sounded like 'a slightly dull horror film', and imagines how this might play out:
Zombies have returned from the grave; only one woman can stop them: Moira Stewart is: The Zombie Hunter, in "28 per cent later".
When attacked by a Zombie Moira is heard to say: "Don't forget, pay by January 31st or...I'll chop your head off"Broadcast on 2 April 2010 during The Now Show on Radio 4.
The Zombie continues it's attack and we hear the sound of Moira's axe fulfilling her threat. She then warns us, ominously, "And remember, tax doesn't have to be... Axing!"
Thursday, May 06, 2010
and say in our report
that cash is overstated,
the cashier being short.
The customer receivables
are very much past due,
and if there are some good ones
they are very, very few.
Inventories are outdated
and principally junk,
and the method of their pricing
is very largely bunk.
So, according to our figures
the undertaking's wrecked,
but, subject to these comments,
the balance sheet's correct.
Origin unknown. Reported on TaxLetter website
Tuesday, May 04, 2010
So tax investigators studied satellite photos of the area — a sprawling collection of expensive villas tucked behind tall gates — and came back with a decidedly different number: 16,974 pools.
Reported in New York Times on 1 May 2010. Full story here: Greek Wealth Is Everywhere but Tax Forms
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
The shepherd looks at the young man, then looks at the large flock of grazing sheep and replies, "Okay." The young man parks the car, connects his laptop to the mobile-fax, enters a NASA Website, scans the ground using his GPS, opens a database and 60 Excel tables filled with algorithms and pivot tables. He then prints out a 150-page report on his high-tech mini-printer, turns to the shepherd and says, "You have exactly 1,586 sheep."
The shepherd cheers, "That's correct, you can have your sheep." The
young man takes an animal and puts it in the back of his Porsche. The shepherd looks at him and asks, "If I guess your profession, will you return my animal to me?" The young man answers, "Yes,why not?"
The shepherd says, "You are an auditor."
"How did you know?" asks the young man.
"Very simple," answers the shepherd. "Firstly, you came here without being wanted. Secondly, you charged me a fee to tell me something I already knew, and thirdly, you don't understand anything about my business..."
".....now can I have my dog back?"
Monday, April 26, 2010
It's hidden offshore in a mighty stash
and now you can't get to it,
because of the ash.
It's not all that rash
It will save you from a nasty
Inland Revenue clash!
We'll let them off the out of date reference to Inland Revenue as presumably HMRC would have prevented the poem from scanning!
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
"I still think we need an episode where Doctor Who sorts out his tax affairs; we still have had no explanation of his means of support and I would imagine that HMRC would be very keen to get their hands on a completed statement of assets for a start.
Sight of his completed DOM1 form would also be interesting, and it’s no good Matt Smith arguing that the department doesn’t issue them anymore, he should have completed one when he was in his original William Hartnell guise.
I’m just trying to figure out whether he would be entitled to the age allowance or not, the good doctor seems to be getting younger (bit like policemen now I think of it and now I think of it are the two somehow connected, it's a police box after all)."
- Richard Curtis on the Taxation blog.
Edit - Peter Martin has since suggested that at least we now know what TARDIS stands for: Tax Avoidance - Residence & Domicile Issues Shafted!
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Apparently this US published book:
"weaves entertaining and educational stories culled from tax accounting since biblical times. It presents the never-before-told story of how American and world history have been profoundly influenced by taxes. Unique, quirky, interlaced with personal accounts, and always enlightening, these amazing tax stories have involved some of our best- known leaders and celebrities."The book contains discussions about tax songs and videos, many of which have appeared on this blog. It also includes lesser know tax related stories including:
- gifts to Anna Nicole Smith.
- Liberace's garish "glamour and elegance," and
- Irving Berlin's songs.
- President Franklin Roosevelt made two attempts at taxing income over $25,000 at a whopping 100 percent! And he saved a future president from prison for criminal tax fraud.
- Abolish the IRS? Andrew Jackson actually did. But it came back 28 years later.
- Prior to 1933, U.S. presidents were exempt from income tax.
- Only one U.S. president has ever visited the IRS building.
Monday, April 12, 2010
Friday, April 09, 2010
"One fashion photographer we consulted found it helpful, when an IRS* auditor came to call, to have several scantily clad models running about the studio to facilitate ordinary, reasonable and clear thinking on the part of the auditor."* US taxman
Thursday, April 08, 2010
Tuesday, April 06, 2010
Jeremy asked why people who are more prepared than him, and book train tickets in advance, pay less for their train tickets.
David Mitchell interpreted this as a complaint about what could be described as a tax on spontaneity.
From 6 November 2009 episode of the News Quiz on Radio 4
At the end of a long day, 2 accountants, Peter and Paul, have had a few drinks and are reviewing their decision to invest in a new building...
1. You work very odd hours. 2. You are paid a lot of money to keep your client happy. 3. You are paid well but your pimp gets most of the ...
An Accountant dies and goes to heaven. Saint Peter starts asking him all the usual questions required to get into heaven. The accountant,...
"Do accountants laugh?" was a question posed online by top Comedy Magician, John Archer ahead of a gig for accountants. Among th...